Colder than a witches tit on the shady side of an igloo

The holidays in Minnesota are always a special time of year. Minnesotan's love winter. Official polls across the nation show that the number one place in the country to freeze your ass off over the winter holiday is the good ol' land of ten thousand lakes. Yes indeed folks each and every Minnesotan looks forward to the first outing of their winter day. For me it's the first dog play of the morning. This event only requires a small amount of preparation. First I must don my under layers; one pair of size 34 bottoms, one pair of size 35 bottoms, one pair of size 36 bottoms, then cap it off with a 1/2 inch think pair of nubby fleece pants. (If it's breezy I may need to top that with a pair of wind pants or I won't see the "boys" for weeks). On the upper extremities; long underwear shirt, wool sweater, nubby fleece pull-over, Himalayan tested expedition parka. Chopper mittens with wool inserts, wool scarf, Sorel boots with 5 pairs of wool socks and a fleece balaclava and I'm ready for adventure. MMMMMmmmm toasty! Even the dog has booties. Yes indeed folks, week upon week of sub zero weather is awesome! (Feel free to send one way plane tickets to Fiji any time!) Happy holidays!